Loquacious

June, 2011 Evince – Larry Oldham and Dena Hill

She Said,

I ran across the word "loquacious" the other day and
I immediately thought about you. Aren't you excited
that one little word brings you to my most intimate
thoughts? You have quite a following on  Facebook
with all of your sayings and notable quotes. One
lady expounded her love for you and said she enjoys
having coffee with you every morning. I looked
around the kitchen for a hidden camera! Don't worry,
I figured it out. You really do have a lot to say
but when you see me falling asleep while you're talking, 
you should realize that I'm on information overload.
But your voice is soothing to me at night when I can't
sleep which is why I sometimes ask you to tell me a
bedtime story. You describe yourself as being very
opinionated and will offer your thoughts freely,
without even being asked. I know a lot of people who
feel that way resulting in a barrage of unsolicited
information that usually leaves me to defend myself.
So one day, I decided that I, too, am entitled to my
own opinions without having to explain why I feel
the way I do. I'm not a "loquacious" person. I prefer
to keep my thoughts to myself. My aunt ( a teacher)
told me  that after she retired, she stopped voicing
her opinions because no one was interested in them
any more. Maybe I've reached that same plateau. If
anyone wants to know how I feel about something,
they'll ask; otherwise, we can talk about the weather
or Osama Bin Laden. Oops! You didn't ask my opinion
about that situation!

He Said

I ran across the words "untalkative", "reticent",
"restrained", "reserved" the other day after having
to look up the word "loquacious".
Those words would be the antonym to your word which
I think probably describes you to a tee. Don't
get me wrong, if certain people call you on the
phone, I have seen you talk for hours and I do mean
hours. When you sit down to talk to me within two
minutes your eyes are closed and you are sleeping.
That is the reason that every time you ask me to
watch TV with you or go to a movie with you, I know
that I  will see them alone. Within minutes you are
sound asleep. Don't take this as a slight because
you work hard, get up early and put in a good ten
hour day. I understand perfectly your need to sleep
standing up or sitting. I want to make this marriage
work and I believe that communication, dedication
and someone who can make good potato salad is the
secret to a long and prosperous relationship. With
that said I offer you this recommendation. Communication
for us from now on will be when you call me on my
cell phone. I have unlimited minutes and it seems
to me that since you talk to all your other friends
for hours there is no reason why this couldn't work
for us. That seems to be the only way you can stay
awake and I get to talk for hours, keeping the
lines of communication open. Dedication is certainly
important and I see that you spend a lot of time
looking words up in the dictionary just to describe me.
Finally, Potato salad. A woman who cannot satisfy
her man with a good potato salad should probably spend
more time with his mother who makes great potato
salad. I hope I have not hit a nerve here. Since I
am a loquacious person, I just wanted to exercise
my right to inform you of what constitutes a good
marriage. The weather changes daily and Osama is no
longer with us and I learned a new word this month.
Thanks for being a good teacher.

Don't forget to remind me to give you my mother's potato
salad recipe.

Ah...the Good Life

Evince May 2011
She Said
 
Just so people won't think all we do is pick on each
other, or worse yet, ask if we're going to make a go
of it, let me say how proud I am to be your wife. You
won "Salesman of the Year" for the Virginia Press
Association last month in Norfolk and handled it with
style and grace and, might I add, a huge case of
nervousness. There aren't many times when you are
so I savored that moment. In fact, our table was
hoping you weren't going to give a speech and "thank
all the people who helped you along the way...."
Seriously though, I don't constantly berate you
for not living up to my expectations. You're an
adult and should know better. What I would like for
people to know is how active you are in church as
a Sunday School teacher, an Elder, and serving on
the PNC to select our new pastor. I've always heard
that ladies should choose a man based on the way
he treats his mother and you are so kind to your
Mom by calling her every day to see how she's doing
and visiting her on weekends. You also check on your
sons to be sure they're happy and life is good for
them. You give back to our community by serving on
the board of the Free Clinic and any other board
that you are asked to join if you think you have
something positive to add. You are a good friend
to our many classmates and help keep the class
connected and in touch with all of the changes going
on with them as we get older. You have a job that you
take to heart by thinking of all of your clients as
friends and you truly want to help them grow their
business. That explains the award. So while you're
thinking about all of the good things you're
involved in, how about taking a little time to
empty your house out and take the next step toward
starting our life together. Oops! I promised
wouldn't be negative...it just slipped out. I love you.  

He Said

Now I am sitting here with a tear in my eye
wondering why I did not marry you years ago.
Just think what you could have done for my
ego and how much larger my head would be today
if you had started all this bragging about me
long ago. I do thank you for your words of kindness
and I guess it is better to talk about our positive
side sometimes and not about our other side. The
only problem though is that everyone needs a good
laugh at least  once a month and this one isn't funny.
You are probably one of the most dedicated teachers
I have ever known. You go to work at 7:30 am and
come home at 7:00 pm almost every night.
I know that you tutor kids who are having a hard time
and that you help kids with their homework assignments.
You work hard to help your own children and were
a single mom with three children, kindergarten,
high school, college, and medical school. 
This takes a tremendous amount of skill, emotional
comforting, and physical stability to accomplish such
a feat. I know others have done it but since I know
you personally, it has affected my life to see you
contribute to the success of all three of your children.
You do this all the while taking care of me, your
fourth child. Cooking, sewing, cleaning,caring and
keeping me on the right track is almost a full time
job in itself. I guess our column this month is somewhat
self-serving; however,it answers the question that
we are so often asked " when are you two going to break up?"  
It seems that some readers take our differences
as a serious sign of unhappiness. Really none of
these things happen to us, well maybe...